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"My Very Cool Telescope!" was originally released on July 16, 2018.

Description

This episode is chock-full of practical tips, like how to punish a bird, and how to defend the honor of your favorite telescope. If you don't use at least one piece of helpful advice from this episode at some point this week, we'll eat all three of our hats.

Suggested Talking Points

Justin's Christmas List, Candy Life Lessons, Telescope Bullies, Hiker Surprise, How to Punish Birds, Hummus Cream, It Catches, Office Improv

Outline[]

00:45 - Intro - Justin hangs out with Jimmy Buffett and basically has the best life ever. Justin attempts to get season 3 of Pete & Pete released on DVD. Griffin eats old hot dogs and maybe gets food poisoning maybe.

07:39 - I live on the third floor of an apartment building. One day, after coming home from a run, the lady who lives on the bottom left of my building whispered "Come here" and gestured to her door. As I walked to her door, she went inside, and I waited outside for a couple of minutes, and then she came back with a box of chocolates. But before she could hand them to me, she asked me where I live. I told her I lived on the top right of our building. She then frowned, shook her head, and put the box of chocolates away. She told me she thought I was the woman who lived on the top left, and then closed the door. I couldn't have eaten the chocolate anyway, but I was very sad that she took them away. The woman she was talking about looks nothing like me anyway. What did the woman across from me do to deserve chocolate? How do I prove to the old lady that I am also deserving of chocolate? - Sad About Sweets in San Diego

MBMBaM_Animation_-_Telescope_Bully

MBMBaM Animation - Telescope Bully

Animated by Avafaid

11:46 - Y - Sent in by Adrian Cowles, from Yahoo Answers user The Geico Lizard, who asks:

What would you do if someone laughed at your telescope?

17:41 - Greetings, brothers! I frequently go hiking, but my legs are very long and I often find myself passing slower hikers. I don't like to raise my voice, especially out in the serenity of the wild, so I usually just try stomping my feet real hard to get their attention. Very often, though, people have headphones in or just don't hear me stomping, and I end up shouting "Hey!" or "Excuse me!" just before I pass them to avoid getting punched. This tends to scare the hell out of people, and I'm wondering if there's something I could be doing differently. Do I need to speak up as soon as I see them? Should I carry a cowbell with me? - Sneaking's Too Easy in East Tennessee

25:03 - Y - Sent in by Stacey Trombone, from Yahoo Answers user Ted Heaton the Third, State Farm Agent, who asks:

What is the right way to scold my lovebird when he does something wrong?

29:12 - MZ - Sponsored by Quip. Message for JP from Meg. Message for Jackson from Michael and Jesse. Message for the KGB from Murphy. Advertisement for Inside Pop.

36:46 - Munch Squad - Hummus and Pita Co.'s Hummus Ice Cream

42:20 - Y - Sent in by "virtually every person who emailed us", from Yahoo Answers user Four Dogs Working Together To Use A Computer, who asks:

Would you be embarrassed if someone tried to kill you in public?

47:48 - We have a large open office with an employee kitchen in the center. Often times, you'll be getting coffee or your lunch and another employee will walk in and do their own thing. Usually there's a polite "hi how are you" and that's it. However, there is one employee, a higher-up at the company, who also does this, but instead of moving on after the greeting, stares at me expectantly waiting for more to be said when there never is more to be said. He then says ".......well, I guess that's the end of THAT conversation.", and continues to do his thing in the kitchen around me. This also isn't a one time thing per employee - he has done this to me and others multiple times. What should I and the rest of my office do when confronted with this awkward character? - Anxious in the Big Apple

53:48 - Housekeeping

56:47 - FY - Sent in by Jordan Brandon, from Yahoo Answers user Amazon, who asks:

What is the name "Todd" short for?

References & Links[]

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