Griffin: Justice will be served and the battle will rage. This big dog will fight when you rattle his cage and you'll be sorry that you messed with the U S of A, cause we'll put a boot in your ass,

Griffin, Justin, Travis <whisper>: it's the American way.

Justin: Welcome to My Brother, My Brother and Me, an advice show for the Modren era, but specifically Toby Keith fans

Travis: What most people don't know is he's quoting Shakespeare there.

Justin: Thats ... Travis works in Shakespeare he's in the Shakespeare biz uh, and that, that is true what Travis is saying right now.

Griffin: Hey ...

Justin: Hey, we got 'em, what?

Griffin: ... Uncle Sam put your name at the top of his list, and the Statue of Liberty started shakin' her fist, and the eagle will fly, man it's gonna be hell, when you hear mother freedom start ringing her bell

Justin <whisper> : Ring the bell, Mother Freedom

Travis: You know we haven't said in awhile but, good work Tristan.

Griffin: Yeah

Justin: Hey you got em man

Griffin: I attribute this success wholely and entirely to him

Justin: Yes. I know he may have just been in bootcamp, and before that a baby, but I think that he probably did this, all on his own. Uh, but now that uh, Osama is dead ...

Griffin: Courtesy of the red, white, and blue ...

Justin: ... courtesy of the red, white, and blue ...

Griffin: I ... you have to say that after every time you acknowledge his death.

Justin: I do, don't worry I do. Who do we ... who, who's next for us? Who's, who's, who's enemy number 1, enemy number uno, right now? Who's the new, who's the new hotness?

Travis: Space Aliens.

Justin: Space Aliens?

Travis: Uh-huh.

Justin: I think that's gonna be, that's sort of a long door play, but I think certainly that they are top <unintelligible>

Travis: It took us 10 years to take out a dude on earth, I think we got time.

Justin: I know. I agree with you, just ...

Griffin: It has to be, it can't be anything ambiguous, it has to be one specific alien. That's the thing, I can't get off, I can't finish, knowing that we are at war with an entire country. But when I think about the full might of the big bad American military, coming after just one dude ...

Justin: Yeah

Griffin: Aw that's the ...

Justin: ... thats the good stuff

Griffin: that's the stuff.

Justin: I like it to be whoever is making the scary movies, still.

Travis: Wes Craven, your ass is grass.

Justin: No ...

Griffin: Not ...

Justin: ... not scary movies, the Scary Movie series, not just like generally <unintelligible> horror films

Griffin: Justin hates getting spooked

Justin: I've been spooked. Nuke him.

Griffin: Nuke him.

Justin: You got, you got me! Let's get a, let's drop a daisy cutter in there, just really murder everybody who made that film. What if Jamie Lee Curtis got caught in the crossfire, you monster. You didn't even think about that. This is an advice show, as you've gathered, this is an advice show for the modren era. I am your oldest brother Justin McElroy.

Travis: I am your middlest brother Travis McElroy

Griffin: And I'm Griffin McElroy.

Justin: Courtesy of the red, white, and blue. So let's get to the advice. So there's this girl I'm really ...

Griffin: Is it, hold on ...

Justin: Woah

Griffin: Is it weird that I am super against the death penlaty, like in every way imaginable, but I'd be ok with, like, putting makeup on Osama Bin Ladin's dead ass assassinated corpse and like letting people like pay 10 bucks to get, like, a funny picture taken with it?

Justin: Yeah its, that's fine. It just means you're like a hugh hypocrite, that's the only thing.

Travis: No here's what it is, I've been thinking about it and I think it's like the difference betwen, you know, you don't wnat to see anyone die, but when someone elevates themselves to the level of, like super-villan

Like mega-dick

Yeah like

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